Two books to read before getting married.
Photo by Brian Lowman
Many girls grow up dreaming about what their special day will be like. They know where they want the ceremony, what flowers they will be holding, and what beautiful white dress they will float down the aisle in.
Although preparing for a wedding can be fun (and a lot of work) planning for marriage is much more essential!
Here are two books to read before getting married that my husband and I read before saying our I Do’s.
Every Saturday morning before I was married, I would listen to Gary Chapman on the radio discussing love, relationships, and marriage. Sometimes he would be discussing questions or problems people had, other times he would discuss different parts of his books. One particular book that both my husband and I read before we were married was his book entitled The Five Love Languages.
My husband and I both knew that we loved each other, and that we would continually work on making a daily choice to love each other throughout our marriage, even so, there is always more to learn about love. Chapman’s book not only taught us about the five different expressions of love, but he also describes them in details, and has a quiz at the end that can help you and your loved one discover their love language.
The five love languages Chapman describes are Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. Chapman describes each love language and how each love language can branch out and even sometimes connect to other love languages. He tells stories of different relationships and problems that he has encountered and how understanding and following through with each others love language can positively affect your marriage and the love you share.
While reading, The Five Love Languages I discovered that I had been showing Roger love the way I had yearned to be loved, while he was showing me love in his own love language. Although our intentions had been good, we were going about love in a completely self-focused way. Chapman’s book not only taught us to look beyond ourselves and our own understanding of how love should be expressed, but to also love each other according to our individual love language.
Marriage was never something that my husband and I lightly or half-heartedly considered. Before marriage, we both understood the realities of marriage and the statistics regarding divorce. However, Roger and I knew that we were going to continually work on our marriage and never let it slip from second place – God being first. This is why we chose to read Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts.
For years, I had been reading books on purity, love, dating, and relationships and I thought that I had a clear understanding and was ready for the challenges that would arise during our marriage. This book opened my eyes to problems and situations I had never even thought of and that have saved us many an argument. The Parrott’s book is broken up into seven distinct chapters that are stated as questions that really dig deep into the realities of marriage of a day-to-day scale.
My husband and I wanted to be prepared for the trials ahead of us, which is why we chose to read this book together. Although we could have read this book separately, reading it together had a great impact on us. Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts is filled with scenarios and good advice that we heavily discussed. In addition, at the end of each chapter there is a page titled “For Reflection” with a list of questions that relate to the topics raised in the chapter.
I whole-heartedly would recommend this book to anyone who is considering marriage and would advise that they should read this with their special someone or fiancé. Even now, as our second year of marriage seems to be flying by I find this book to continue to speak true on where we are in our relationship as a married couple.
I’d love to hear from you!
What are your favorite books about marriage & God’s love?
Feel free to comment below, email me, or tweet me on Twitter!
With love, G